Connection

We've had a lot of snow in KC. I mean a lot. And I don't have school aged kids so having school out only mildly effected us (Sariah missed 2 days of preschool). But I have the worst case of cabin fever. With 3 littles it is hard to talk myself into bundling everyone up to brave the cold. Also it is the end of the month so I'm on the end of my budget rope. So I didn't want to add temptation to just spend more money.

But man I've been lonely. And it isn't just the snow. I went to a little meet and great baby shower for a new girl in my ward. It was awesome and sad all in one. It was so nice to see and talk to adults. But also made me still feel distanced from everyone. I went into Primary a few weeks after moving into the ward. It is has been rough. I love the kids I teach, but my natural inclination is to be much more shy and introverted. So having that extra distance of not being with the other adults on Sunday is making it so hard for me to make any real friendships.

So while it was awesome to be around adults. I could also see that some of the people who are newer than me have already made better connections than me.

And I'm just in a bit of a lonely funk right now. Honestly not sure quite what to do to change it. Life is so busy that I almost don't have time to do anything about it. I am barely and many days not even able to keep up. But yet my soul is lonely.


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The whole story

So after briefly talking about Ben’s nighttime adventures in the other post, I decided it was worth telling the whole story as its own post.

Ben has never been a good sleeper, but lately what he does when he gets up has been……interesting??

So a few backup examples:

A long time ago, probably while he was still 2.  I woke up to “Go Diego Go” theme song.  I came out to find him watching Diego on the iPad at the kitchen table at about 3 am.

A few weeks ago, I heard rustling downstairs.  I came down to find him pushing the barstool up to the cabinet and trying to stand on it to get the cereal from the top shelf.  (Yes if a robber came in the middle of the night, I would probably assume it was Ben and some downstairs in less than appropriate nightwear. :))

So then this week- he’s had two exciting nights.

The first night, I decided I needed a relaxing bath as I’ve been, well, a bit high strung lately.  So I spent a long time with the jets on after “putting the kids to bed.”  I came out to hear rustling downstairs again, and at first thought it was just James.  So I go down the hall to find that Eli’s door is open, light on, and he’s fast asleep in his crib.  (This was when I knew it was Ben not James.)  So I pulled Eli’s covers on him, turned out the light,and took a deep breath as I headed downstairs. 

Ben was sitting at the kitchen table (at least that part he is pretty good at.)  I walk over to find scissors clutched in his hand, a shredded label on the donut package, a shredded cookie wrapper, and a half eaten cookie in his other hand.  Oh yes.  He has tried to cut into the donut package (the plastic kind from the bakery).  I guess when that failed, he remembered that dad had brought home cookies from work.  So he had all three of them over with him.  But had managed to cut only one open when I came down. 

So I’ve been working on my anger management- especially when it comes to Ben.  So I calmly told him that he couldn’t have the rest of the cookie until tomorrow and to get back into bed.  He cried a little, but obliged and went upstairs.  I was actually pretty surprised at how easy he went to bed.  I cleaned up the mess and then heard rustling upstairs.

Somehow he snuck a bag of pineapple chips upstairs with him and was trying to eat those.  I PROMISE we feed him.  He had eggs, grits, and toast for dinner.  He even got a donut for FHE dessert.  The kid wasn’t starving or anything! 

So needless to say that when I found him last night at 1am in Eli’s room.  I wasn’t surprised.  I was surprised that he was asleep in the rocking chair and Eli was up having a party in his crib.

 

Not sure I’ll ever get a good night’s sleep. 

Naughty Naughty

So a friend from the ward is putting together a slide show of “naughty” kid pictures.  Looking through I guess my kids aren’t as naughty as I thought!  Or at least they know to avoid the camera when doing naughty things.  Hehehe 

 

Here is what I found.

Sure do miss him

I was looking for photos for something else and ran across these pictures of Sariah and my dad.  I sure do miss him. 

 

No one is destined to fail.

Every person is different and has a different contribution to make. No one is destined to fail. (2012 October General Conference, Help Them Aim High, Priesthood Session - By Henry B. Eyring)

As I was reading conference talks tonight, this little bit stood out to me. I was just emailing James today that part of my stress is the I don't feel like I'm really succeeding at anything right now. My house seems to always be a mess. I've been short fused with my kids. Ben and I seem to always be battling (in particular). School is driving me crazy and I'm burned out. My calling in Primary leaves me lonely at church although I love the kids, the calling is a struggle for me. James and I get very little time together with our crazy schedules. Yep the failure list seems to be a mile long right now.

Then I read this. And tonight was actually a really good night. We had FHE. I took a nice relaxing bath. I didn't lose it when I got out of said bath and found Ben had gotten out of bed, gone in Eli's room and turned on the lights (thankfully Eli was still asleep), gone downstairs, gotten out scissors and after failing to cut into the donuts we had for our treat, he did shred into a cookie that he was half done eating. And yet I didn't yell, didn't get mad, didn't laugh (at least not in front of him). And calmly disciplined him and put him back to bed.

Reading this reminded me that I'm not meant to fail. And actually I'm not currently failing. Life is crazy. I still hope it will slow down some day. But I'm doing okay.

Enough ramblings for now.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

On the table

First a disclaimer. I'm writing this with a new app so not sure how the formatting will work. ... On to the post

Eli has been "standing" in his high chair on the foot rest for a while. But today I didn't put his tray on AND didn't buckle him in. I just scooted him to the table with some crackers. I came back to find him on the table. He's figured out how to climb out of the high chair onto the table.

And of course he thinks he is hilarious doing so. Ohh this boy's ornery streak is coming out.

The hat pictures

So I meant to do this right after posting the party pictures, but ahhh life. 

Okay so sadly this isn’t everyone.   But here are those nieces and nephews who live here and were able to come with their NEW Christmas hat….

First up the Lisa’s kiddos-  I must say that I think my sister has some of the most photogenic kids ever!!

     

Then my kiddos:

Kris’s kiddos:

 

 

Meagan’s kiddos:

 

And my brother Seth’s middle daughter:

 

 

And one more just cause it’s so cute….Uncle Matt and Eli.

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Christmas- Yes I know it is February

So I know I’m a little behind.  But the point is that I put stuff on here, not that I do it perfectly.  So here are some fun pictures from the Mayo Family Kids Exchange.  Up next will be individual shots of each grandkid.

Just hanging out..

Gotta have a few goofy face pictures- Thanks Rhianna.

Ben was a super helper and handed out all of the presents.

Daddy and Eli

So excited and patiently waiting for the go ahead.

And…..open

Putting on the hot new hats..

Mommy and Eli- yes I’m holding his hands to keep him from ripping the hat right off.

 

And the well intentioned group shot.  Yes lots of tears, groans, pokes, and complaints.  No not everyone is looking at the same time.  We did try bribery but well you can see it didn’t work so well.